Friday, January 28, 2011

24 Hour Flu

Shut Up and Just Enjoy Yourself

Sometimes [often] I wonder how I got here. Is this life real? These moments, all so special. All so complete. All so perfect and right. How how how whywhywhy. Then the other voice in my head speaks louder and says 'shut up and just enjoy yourself.'

Saturday, January 22, 2011

My Favorite Shoes I Never Wear

Vintage and only $5!; totally not my size, but couldn't resist

Bought new 5 years ago

My grandmother's Stuart Weitzman's from the 80's!

Vintage 80's cuties

My Jeffrey Campbell sparkly booties; bought new
a couple of years ago -I actually do wear these.
Still my favorite pair of shoes.

These shoes are pretty rad, got them cheap in Providence, RI

Vintage Rabbit-fur booties from the 80's

Monday, January 17, 2011

Unignorably Divine: Mat Trumbull

"Because we live in such a mind-dominated culture, most modern art, architecture, music, and literature are devoid of beauty, of inner essence, with very few exceptions. The reason is that the people who create those things cannot -- even for a moment -- free themselves from their mind. So they are never in touch with that place within where true creativity and beauty arise. The mind left to itself creates monstrosities, and not only in art galleries. Look at our urban landscapes and industrial wastelands. No civilization has ever produced so much ugliness."
- The Power Of Now, Eckhart Tolle

It has become very obvious to me when artists can let go of their thoughts - their ideas - their plans - their 'self' - and tap into 'that place within' ... or whatever you want to call it. The art, music, whatever medium - is somehow unignorably divine. It hits you. Meet Mat Trumbull:

Thursday, January 13, 2011

I Am A Dog Person

Louis Wain's paintings: Started off pretty normal, but started to get a little freaky deaky with age [& mental illness]. I love where his paintings ended up. You might think they are creepy, but I think he tapped into something that is unavailable to most people.

Wednesday, January 12, 2011

The Loss of Identity

I stopped caring about my identity.

Dude, I wish you would've known me.
I was all about "I'm this" "I'm not that" ...
Intentionally putting myself into categories.
A perfectly crafted prison.

Decorating myself with the perfect 'costumes,'
making sure that everyone 'got it.'
Making sure everyone 'knew' who I was,
even though I was none of those things.
Had no idea who I was.
I clung so tight to this 'identity,'
and identity marked by confusion and oxymorons.
An identity that basically made no sense.

I had this because I was hiding,
from myself.
And protecting myself from you, from the world.
From the hurt.

And at some point in the past couple years, I just stopped caring.
Stop trying to identify myself, or define myself,
because the action began to define itself,
and not define itself all at the same time.

It all just stopped mattering,
because of the constant willingness
and open mindedness,
I let myself be constantly redefined by something else
a lot more powerful than me.
And through all of this, lies a foundation,
a consistency, a rhythm,
no longer marked be 'me' or 'my-self.'

Where did I go?
Well, I am right here.

Monday, January 3, 2011